Dream Chronicles: Chasing My Dreams
When I started writing my first book, Drome[1] Chronicles, Volume I, I was thinking about my great grandmother Abigail Brown and the generations of daughters that she produced. Abigail was a dream interpreter. Don’t laugh…Don’t write it off. She really could look into the dreams of others and explained what they possibly meant for the future. Very few people can do this. I believe that we, in this new millennium, no longer possess the ability to read others dreams; but we have also forgotten how to dream for ourselves. We start in kindergarten and follow a monotonous path towards college and a career because that is what the world has told us to do. But when we were small, we had dreams! It started when we slept. Things formed in our mind while we slept. Super fantastic ideas! But when we woke up we forgot our dreams. As a matter of fact, that is actually how doctors and scientists know that you have gone into REM sleep (the good sleep where your body actually rests and repairs itself). They say, if you remember all of your dreams that you didn’t go into REM sleep and that you probably didn’t get a good night’s rest. But what happens to the dreams we forget? What happens to the dreams we place on the backburner? Or the ones that never fully form because we become adults and start drinking and taking drugs and fall into deeper levels on unconsciousness where our dreams can’t fully surface again. We look up and we are stuck in boring jobs, living boring lives, wondering what happened. How did we get here? But I finally decided, after writing about my family in a fictitious world that needs dreams to survive, that I actually needed my dreams to survive. I needed to remember the dreams that I had and bring them to fruition. It has taken me several years to plan this out. It took time for me to pull on every resource that I have ever possessed. But I am finally able to Chase my Dreams! There are four things that I felt compelled to focus on when I started this journey: My Purpose, My Passion, My Family, and My Labor. As adults, we have to realize that we aren’t kids anymore. That was hard for me. Anyone who knows me, knows that I have a mega-Peter Pan complex…or maybe even Toys-R-Us Syndrome: I Don’t Wanna Grow Up! But growing up is inevitable. Maybe that’s what they should be teaching in the schools instead of force feeding college and careers that some kids aren’t ready for? Teach us that growing up is inevitable; but following your dreams is attainable! You see, I was never actually taught that I had a specific Purpose: A reason the Creator placed me on this Earth. A reason that I didn’t die when I tried so desperately to do so. A reason that I didn’t go to jail when I made all those dumb decisions. A reason that I kept getting saved when I thought I didn’t deserve it (and probably didn’t). It was because I was supposed to be here. I was supposed to do “something.” Unfortunately, the world told me I was supposed to go to school and get a job. But that wasn’t actually the Creator’s purpose. The things I went to school for initially had nothing to do with the Creator’s purpose. See, the Creator’s purpose was far simpler. The Creator’s purpose for me was simply to work with teenagers. That’s what I’m good at. I speak teenagese. Do you know your Purpose? I bet you thought it was at your job. But it might not be. It may have something to do with your job, but quite possibly your job may not be the only way you can fulfill your purpose. I went to school to be a lawyer…but I became a teacher. They had nothing to do with each other. But the Creator knew better than me. Thank goodness. I always loved drawing and writing, but who has time to do that when you are trying to go to college and you are working 40 hours a week. Guess what? School is a 40 hour a week job. Did you know that? We start sending our kids to work at the ripe age of 5 in the United States. Getting them ready for that 40 hour a week job. And very quickly, they don’t have time for their Passion. Writing and Drawing is my Passion. I am an artist! Ha! I didn’t even know that until 4 years ago (and I’m almost 40!). I’m not trained. I didn’t take a lot of art classes. But I love to paint and I love to write and I can honestly say that I’m not too bad at it. It comes with ease. Because guess what? This is my gift from the Creator. I have been blessed to be able to do this to relax and enjoy myself. To help me find peace. AND my Passion has started to align with my Purpose. The teenagers that I have connected with have started to read my work and find meaning. And Voilà! My Passion and my Purpose have started to come together. But I continued to struggle in my life because My Family was suffering. With my job as an educator, there were several issues:
This May (2017), I left the profession that found me many years ago when I wasn’t even looking. I decided to quit being a teacher. So many people (students, parents, family, and friends) have questioned my decision. They have validated my belief that teaching young people is truly what the Creator intended for me to do. But this was the only way I could follow my Dreams! I realized that being a classroom teacher wasn’t the only way I could work with young people. Following your Dreams is what the Creator really intended for his children. Not to be bored, or sad. Not to feel worn down by the day to day activities of life. For my Labor (the way I make money), the Creator has given me the greatest opportunity of a life time. The Creator said: “Step out on Faith and Follow ME.” Faith is not tangible. You can’t see it. You can’t touch it. You have to believe that what you are doing is the right thing, and you have to follow it. I resigned from my position at 7:00 am on a Monday, by noon that day I had a new offer that will allow me to work with teenagers in a less restrictive manner; but it will give me time to be with my family as well and I will be able to make decent money at the same time. I will be able to teach writing to those students and help them see their true potential. I believe that as long as I am helping young people (My Purpose) that the Creator will keep my Labor growing faster and stronger than it ever was when I settled for being a teacher. Because ultimately, I am a teacher by calling not by job. I believe that if I am writing and painting (My Passion), the Creator will provide me with happiness and peace when I can’t find it on this planet; and when I least expect it he will align it to my Purpose. And finally, by following the Creator’s design, My Family will have a Mommy who is present and not tired all the time. A Mommy who can give her all. My friends will have their friend back to answer the phone when they call. And my Labor will be provided through the works of my Purpose and my Passion! What is your Purpose, your Passion, and your Labor? Are they aligned? Do they allow you time for your Family and Friends? That’s what life is for: Having peace on this Earth! And if we don’t Dream big, remember our Dreams, and chase them vigorously…we will be lost. These are my chronicles: My Dream Chronicles. Be blessed and prosper! [1] Drome: Dream in Afrikaan
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For the ONES who create life:
I remember my mother. She glowed. I didn't have brothers or sisters. It was me and her. We glowed. For so long, she spoke only to my mind. She talked to me about emotions and feelings, though I never understood what she meant. I didn't think that I felt anything. She told me that there were other senses that she couldn't show me or explain to me, but that one day I would have them. I would create a world where I could see, feel, taste, hear, and smell; but all I could do at that time was hear. I could hear her. Soon, I began to sense something warm when she would talk to me. She said that I was beginning to develop the sense of touch. Soon I could feel that the world around me was not void as I had imagined it to be; it was full of things...life. And before too long, I had five senses. Sight was the last sense to develop for me. I was able to see my mother through the glow for the first time. She had dark smooth skin. Her hair was bright like the sun and spiraled around her face. Her eyes were almond-shaped and glowed like crystals above her high cheekbones. Hands large. Fingers long. Wide hips. Long legs. She was amazing. I wanted to spend every day with her. I wanted a special place just for us where I could listen to her melodic voice and watch her graceful ways. She taught me to form visions in my mind...to create things using her world as inspiration. One day, I formed my own world in my mind. A place where I could spend time with my mother. Before I knew it, I'd shaped and molded my thoughts into a tangible place...something I could hold in my hands. As I created things for our special place, I noticed that my world became larger while her world became smaller and smaller. I spent less time talking to and being with my mother; and by the time I had created my world, my mother had disappeared. I could no longer find her. I spent a lot of time looking for her before I realized that I was no longer in her world. I was completely encompassed in my own world. She was not there. The loneliness was stifling. My mother once told me that creating life was a difficult task...that you had to shape and mold the creations you create. She had created me...I was her first life. I was her only life. Without her, I wanted a life of my own to shape and mold; so I abandoned her world and developed my own. I don't know what happened to her or to her world. I don't know if they still exist in time and space. But my world is here! I will shape and mold the lives I create. I will teach them what abandonment is, and I will teach them to never abandon the ones they love. My world is here...and I bring forth LIFE!!! Ilanga (The Sun) To those who are parents:
Before my daughter, Ẹlẹdàá, created her World of Drome, I created my world. Ẹlẹdàá was far more successful at creating life than I was. I was only able to form my mate, Osupa, and the world around us. I also lost my mother in the process. Ẹlẹdàá was more fortunate. I am able to see her world and share her experiences with her. I am able to guide her...to an extent. But my world...my world started small. My mother's world was large and spacious. There was air around us...and the ground below us. But it was limited to the area we were in. I didn't have a place for myself. She didn't have a place for herself. We slept under the darkness. When I decided to create a place for my mother and I, I took pieces of her world to create an enclosed space (people call them rooms now). I took soil from the ground and began to build and form our room. Once I had built one room, I felt like it was small and cramped; so I expanded the walls. The room became larger. Then I decided to add decorations to the room. Once I had added decorations to the room, the room was filled to the brim and I needed to expand the walls yet again. I made it larger. Then I decided to make a room for myself and a room for my mother, so I made a second room. But then, I thought we would need a room for both us to be in together; so a third room was built. That's how I lost her...my mother. I kept making rooms and expanding each room each time. My rooms became my world. I couldn't find my way out, and I guess she couldn't find her way in. My mother's world disappeared all together. Is her world still wrapped around mine? Did my world absorb her world? Does she watch me from where she is? My daughter's world is much larger than mine, but she has contained it. She never lost us. She has wrapped her world so that she can watch it and live in ours at the same time. But at night, I see her longing. I see that she wants to be a part of her world. She wants to leave. I can't imagine how my mother felt when she couldn't find me anymore. Maybe she let me leave. Maybe I never abandoned her. Is it still abandonment if your child asks to go? What will I say if she does? Ilanga (The Sun) A Leap of Faith: The Brown Clan of Edisto Island
2/29/2016 Today is a Leap Day. It only happens every four years. How unfortunate to be born on Leap Day? I would be pissed if my birthday only came every four years! Do they re-compute everyone's age to account for Leap Years? By this thought process, surely I am younger! Why do we have them? What does it do for the world to have one year every four years with an extra day added. As if it weren't mind boggling enough that February only has 28 days? But then we go and add an extra day to the weird month every four years. Ultimately, I write today to express my disgust of the Leap Year AND to take an opportunity to Leap out on Faith! When I first started writing Drome Chronicles, I honestly just wanted to share a part of my family with the world. The Brown Family from Edisto Island, South Carolina: A family that has always believed in the power of dreams. Some people call us superstitious, but my family knew exactly what our beliefs meant and we have always had faith in them-Our Dreams. Gateways into our hopes and desires! Foresight into the future. My Aunt Jackie was raised on Edisto Island with Grandma Abby. My Aunt Jackie was the oldest of four sisters. And all of four of them passed on the traditions and beliefs of Grandma Abby. Listening or smelling for rain. Predicting the birth of a child or the death of a loved one. They all carried Grandma Abby with them. When my aunt passed in October 2015, I felt like we lost a huge part of our history. Last week, the last male-born Brown passed away. It hurt to lose my cousin, but it hurt even more to understand what his death symbolized. The true end of the Brown clan. Well...in light of my belief in good over evil, truth over lies, and family over enemies, I wholeheartedly believe that you have to find the silver lining in all things. I have decided that today, February 29, 2016, is now Veracity Williams's Leap of Faith Day. As I finish up the final stages to self-publishing my very first book: Drome Chronicles, I realize that this has been a huge Leap of Faith. Faith that people will love my stories...that people will love them enough to buy them. Faith that people will remember the Browns of Edisto Island as they read about the Browns of Benaly Island. Faith that as I mourn the loss of Justin Brown, he along with all of the other Browns that have gone before him will be immortalized in the pages left by a descendant of Abigail and George Brown. The Original Brown Clan of Benaly...oops, of Edisto Island! (RIP) Rest In Pages: Abigail and George Brown, Richard and Annye Ruth Brown, Aunt Jackie, Cousin Justin |
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